I wanted to start off by sharing just a little bit about my Crossfit experience so far.
First of all, let me just say that I LOVE it.
I guess you could say I’ve drank the Kool-Aid. I’m trying not to be one of those crazy-obsessed-can’t-talk-about-anything-else Crossfitters though. I try to keep my passion for it in check around people who don’t work out or don’t agree with the whole Crossfit thing. Except for my husband. I tell him stories from the gym all day long. He basically just nods and smiles, although sometimes I’ll manage to get a teasing “Good job, bro” comment and a fist bump out of him if I increased my weight or accomplished something I’ve been practicing for a while. For the most part though, I’m pretty hush-hush about it.
My Crossfit journey so far has had a lot of ups and downs. I started going in August 2015. For the first couple of months, I didn’t feel that great about myself. I had a really stressful job in New York City, worked long hours, and had a sucky commute. I wasn’t sleeping well and gained about 20 pounds in just one year. I was frequently one of the last people in class to finish a WOD. I was mad that I couldn’t lift a lot of weight. I felt like people were silently judging me. I came home from class feeling defeated and discouraged more often than not.
So why did I keep up with it if I didn’t enjoy it? The thing is, I was enjoying it on some level, even though I felt like I was the worst Crossfitter in the world. The workouts were great, even though I sucked at them, and it was fun to be around people with similar interests as me, even if I thought they were trying not to laugh at me when I had to use two assistance bands to do pullups (which, it turns out, was just all in my head). I also didn’t want to be a quitter. And it was a good thing, too, because things started to change after several weeks.
In October, I got a new job. The commute and hours were much better, which did wonders for my stress level and just my mood in general. Then in January, the coaches at my box ran a couple of nutrition challenges, which really helped me get my diet back in check. Sometime around March, something finally clicked with me. I became more confident in lifting heavier weights and I had more energy during the WODs. I started losing some of the weight I had gained (I’m now down 13 pounds since January, woo!). Instead of driving to class already telling myself that there was no way I would finish that day’s WOD, I started telling myself that I can do this. I stopped worrying so much, realized that nobody was judging me, and had more fun at the gym. Or at least as much fun as you can have when you’re doing what feels like a bazillion thrusters and burpees.
Do I still doubt myself? Of course. Do I still get tired and want to give up during a WOD because I just don’t want to do it anymore? Absolutely. Those moments are getting fewer and farther between, though.
It’s been a bumpy ride so far, but I’m sure many other Crossfitters can relate. There are still a few things that I need to keep working on. And by a few things, I mean pretty much everything. But I know I’ll reach my goals at some point. For now, I have some smaller goals that I’m working towards, which I’ll talk about along the way on here.
